The Wanderer  •  August 30th, 2018

PORTLAND – “Its just so dank over there” quoted one of the many recent YFS fam visitors gracing Rose City’s hazy doorstep. The tang of fresh slugger, emptied Hamms pounders, Select Oil vape juice and a spritz or two of glory have made for one hell of a cocktail in Oregon’s largest city per capita.

Also on a sidenote Dank City also has been known to boast the highest strip clubs per capita over any other city in the nation. Science…

Sandwiched in between an unannounced U-9 devil children soccer soiree and the sinking Sun, Rose City’s latest stickball outing felt short and seemed to lose a bit steam compared to recent tilts. Then from behind homeplate a waft of life! Something fertile feeling began to creep in. “it was warm and made me feel like everything was going to be alright” claimed a slightly bamboozled Outdoorsman. The Mothership’s very own Big Sexy had smoothly appeared in the midst of inning 5. His supple grip on the bat, his effortless gyrating approach to routine outfield fly balls had the flatlined Diamond squad bouncing. Stringing together a couple of hits, it all seemed to be going right for the Diamonds. That was all before Big Trip decided to put his stamp on things, slugging a grand salami into the near pitch black sky to seal the deal.

“Everything felt so right and then so wrong” quoted a shirtless, blush faced, tossled hair Big Sexy whilst smoking a Malboro Light.

H’s: 8
D’s: 1

Dongs: Big Trip 1 (32)

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