YFS BROOKLYN SQUAT-LOWERS THE MOTHER NUTS INTO INADEQUATE LEAGUE-MOUTHS ON ROAD TO GALACTICS II DESTINY
The Minister • September 9th, 2022
Rosarito BC, Mexico – Like mature birds of prey regergitating into the open hungry beaks of hairless stickball babes – Brooklyn’s 8-Ball, Monk-Dank, Jeffery Bomber, and Fart Cop routinely served the YFS opposition trays of prison lunch while tucking them in their cribs and hush-reading the award-winning children’s bedtime book, Night Night, You Fuckin’ Losers. The Brooklyn Four became the second chapter in YFS history to covet The Nancy B. Wood Galactics Cup last, last, last, last, last, last, last, last, last, last Sunday under the bright lights at...
YFS GALACTICOS DOS PREVIEW
Big Sex • March 29th, 2022
Here’s your unreadable racing form for the worst cult convention in the galaxy!
Brooklyn Champions roster:
Fart Cop a.k.a. Meat Dolphin a.k.a. Dazzler a.k.a. Nerf Hoops
8 Ball a.k.a. Ya, Jeans! a.k.a. Four Dicks
Sawmill a.k.a. Geoffrey Bomber a.k.a. Baby Spice
Monk Dank a.k.a. Mr. Pocket a.k.a. Drunk Tank
In October, the Coney Island Ice Queen, probably the longest dongest most cavernous haunt in the YFS, hosted Brooklyn’s first Fall Classic not at the eponymous YF Cathedral (our late mom herself,...
YOUR LATE AS NUTS BUT BETTER THAN NEVER 2020 YFS DIPSHIT POWER RANKINGS
1 (–) KATFISH GLOBAL UNLIMITED
Home Ballpark: Everywhere and anywhere he goes
Years in the league: 7
The Chosen one is the YFS platinum dipshit model that doesn't identify with the YFS, or anything that has that stupid YFS mark on it and doesn’t have the far superior KATFISH mark name branded, sharpied, or tattooed on it. KGU is the Kleenex of Dipshits if a Dipshit were a go anywhere snot goalie. The Peleton of Dipshits if a Dipshit were a dumb TV-bike that doesn’t go anywhere when you peddle it. Katfish would just get a
YFS GALACTIC ONE DUMMIES FINALLY EXCHANGE GLORY CASH FOR CARTE BLANCHE ITALIAN SPREAD ‘N FLICK COMBO FOR MEXICAN ORPHANS
The Minister • December 8th, 2021
TIJUANA – Shit on a cracker that took a while. You may be thinking – why on earth did it take this long to get the money raised at the Galactics in 2019 to hit our orphan recipients. It’s the pig in the room as big as Dumbo (no not that DUMBO) so let’s address it and not pretend the timeline was to HQs liking but in the end worked out as perfect as Katfish Global’s profile. The beef? Trying to locate an orphanage where we can get the money directly to the kids...
THE 2021 WIDE OPEN WORKED LIKE A DEEP-FRIED ROLEX
The Minister • November 9th, 2021
NEW ORLEANS – The 2021 Wide Open tournament went down last weekend in New Orleans which was the brainchild of The 2019 YFS Galactic Champions, The Dirty South. The 3-day modern stickball soiree was one filled with Glory, insults, stupidity, laughs, beats, costumes, dance moves, nonsense, and was fittingly capped off by some walk-off heroics by a YFSLA man named Boogie Joe. The tournament was a product of 5 cities where old friends and new celebrated the pastime we can’t get enough of. YFS HQ would like to thank the Dirty South...