The Intern • June 21st, 2018
LOS ANGELES – Could you imagine if this had been the YFSLA’s first ever championship? If it had, the stories of Eazy Up’s all around dominance- the 6 Bombs, the stellar fielding, the consistently diamond sharp rips, even an errant bat toss that somehow impressed the degenerates as well as the picnickers- would have been passed down to future stickballers no bigger than a wriggling spermatozoa floating in the loins of some unaware doofus cutting his grass on a Sunday afternoon while listening to NPR’s Fresh Air.
No doubt those tales would have engend a generation of stickballers to come.
If it had been the championship, the name Eazy Up would be on the lips of every single horned up female from Bakersfield to Malibu.
And yet, it wasn’t.
So, did that lack of import stop the kid who has showed up every weekend this season toting a sun-blocking structure for the betterment of all his fellow stickballers? Fuck no. Eazy doesn't have a drop of entitlement in him. That's why he's Eazy. He took a swig off the top shelf Champaign supplied by the Class Act CUTZ, took aim at the bunting in the outfield, and then went off in a matchup that will from now on be known as the Baker’s Cup AKA The Big Yeasty - a really great chance for stickballers who just haven’t had quite enough time on Blacktop Beach to reacquaint themselves with the noble pastime so they can have ample time to prepare for the final chapter of our YFSLA Season known simply as The End.
Let’s not forget the Veterans who showed up this day. It wasn’t just the rooks putting in work- Raw Dog and the Surgeon weren’t comfortable to rest on the laurels of their past glories. They showed up at The Airfield and put their years of experience on display. And what resulted was yet another instant classic and the YFSLA’s first ever triple header.
The Cards placed Rookie Josh L AKA Country Club, Rookie Tommy O AKA Nickname Rescinded, The Intern, and Raw dog on the Reds. The Blacks came to play with The Surgeon, Rookie Zack C, Rookie Colby P AKA CLASS ACT CUTZ, Rookie Adam P, Big Extra nee Big Wednesday, and Rookie Luke L AKA The Algorithm.
While the blacks managed to draw first blood with an opening inning run. It was soon erased in the second when the bats heated up for Reds . They stamped 4 runs on the board behind an opening salvo of dingers from Country Club and Easy Up and never looked back. The Reds cruised to an 8-2 victory.
In the second game, the Blacks struck back behind the big time swing of the Surgeon. And while Eassy Up did his best to keep the Reds in the game with 2 more ding dong daddies, the Blacks squeaked out a 5-4 win that forced a pivotal game 3 - it was the Baker’s Cup after all.
In the third contest of the day Raw Dog and Easy Up double teamed the pines and picnic tables surrounding our Friendly Confines. They single handedly responded to a 3 run opening blitz by the Blacks and righted the ship for the Reds, leading to a 5-4 victory and the first ever Baker’s Cup trophy- a loaf of sourdough bread.
The first ever Baker’s Cup MVP goes to Eazy Up.
YFS Officials are still in negotiations over dates and times for The End and all its preceding ceremonies.
G1: Rs: 8, Bs: 2
G2: Bs: 5, Rs: 4
G3: Rs: 5, Bs: 4
HRs: Eazy Up: 6, The Surgeon: 4, Raw Dog: 2, Country Club: 1
Love,
YFSLA
Death From Below