Seadderall • October 20th, 2020
JET CITY - Melee Season 4 has seen the Plowboys pushing their endurance to the utmost limits that Centrum Silver can allow. When facing the elderly immuno issues heading into the second wave of the pandemic your favorite Stickballer's favorite Stickballers took a 19 day hiatus to ensure all were healthy. The "athletes" gathered on a grey, damp Monday afternoon, and the geniuses in Jet City decided to meet a bit earlier to beat the darkness that quickly encapsulates all things in the winter months of the Northwest.
Dontonio Bibi fresh out of his COVID hibernation decided to make an appearance and finely coif the pride of all natural YFS fields. After Bibi finished his work he disappeared back into the bush like Shoeless Joe Jackson into a corn maze. The cards were drawn and the teams came out tilted in one favor. Reds: Big Bat Bacon, Daisy Cutter, Double Meat, Rookie John I; Blacks: Well Fed Man, Seadderall, Rookie Chris, Rookie Drew, Rookie John II. Oddsmakers from the Walla Walla Street Journal put all their money on team Red. The socially distanced, gaping groupies bussed in from Startup even showed favor to the Red squad.
Game 1 saw a quick start out of the gate. Heavy hitters Rookie John, D.C. and Double Meat all contributed yayas to take a 6-0 lead into the bottom of the 5th. The rookie bats on Black showed their lack of experience, 50/50 was trying to learn how to use his new "Lil' Bitch" and Well Fed Man wasn't spraying his patented oppo single. But after some drops in the outfield and some timely singles Rookie Chris popped a deep shot to center for a Grand Slam putting the score at 6-4 and giving the Blacks a glimmer of hope. Well Fed Man played deep in the bush on defense like a long lost Landmine. This tactic proved big as he prevented a potential grand slam into only one RBI by batting the ball down and keeping it in play. Alas, the Reds kept the pedal to the metal in the late innings and kept hitting dongs deep into the bush. Final score 11-6.
As Game 2 began the sunset was imminent and the boys aimed to try and complete a six inning game. With little light the Reds took an early 3-0 lead headed into the third inning. The bats were still non existent for the Blacks. As the Reds put a few more into the bush courtesy of Double Meat and Daisy they held a comfortable 8-0 lead into the bottom of top of the 5th. As light was as hard to find as a bright yellow Penn the Blacks finally saw a HR from Rookie Drew and Rookie Chris. Seadderall cursing his new stick with zero stats to show claimed he was sending it back to Hoboken if he didn't connect. Sure enough next at bat he popped a lucky blind dinger into left center. 8-3 headed into the top of the 6th saw another lucky blind HR in the dark by the Blacks but it wasn't enough as the game ended at 8-4. After six innings no one could see two feet in front of them and they called the game.
G1 – R's: 11, B's: 6
G2 – B's: 4, R's: 8
HRs: Daisy Cutter: 5 (48), Rookie John I. 3 (X), Double Meat, 2 (26), Rookie Chris: 2 (30), Seadderall, 2 (24), Rookie Drew: 1 (X)